My Three Year Old Wants to Smoke

When you have a three year old, she wants to do everything she sees someone else doing. It started at around two, when we were in line waiting for the Monsters Inc ride at Disneyland and another parent swung their kid up high while waiting in line. She looked at me and said “I want to do that.” So we did it. I swung her and the line finally moved and we got on the ride. It’s not bad. Not great, but not bad. At this point, I expect a little bit more from my robotics than a blink and a hand gesture, but I’m highly critical of cybernetic technology. It’s not the 50s anymore. I’m just saying.

So this “I want to do that: continued with everything from seeing someone drive a truck, ride a bus, or watching Spiderman spin a web, any size, and then catch thieves just like flies. Look out! Here comes the Spiderman… And yes, I trashed that WB new Spiderman show before, but once I got past the weird character design, it’s actually a pretty good show. Bella and I watch it together every Saturday Morning. She also wants to now go to high school and fight the Green Goblin, but one thing at a time.

We went out to dinner at the Cheesecake Factory last night, always an adventure with two kids, and when Bella got antsy I took her to walk around the rim of the small fountain. I held her hand and she loved walking around it until the security guard told us to stop. He said we could throw money in, though, that was okay. Geez. Thanks.

So we were sitting there, not walking around the fountain when Bella pointed to someone who sat near us. “I want to do what that man is doing.” She said.
“What Man?”
“That Man, right there.”
“I looked over at it was a man smoking. Then I looked again and realized it was actually a woman. The irony almost made me laugh out loud. I kept thinking of that “Smoking is Beautiful” poster they had up in high school with this wrinkled old ugly man smoking.
So I said, “No Bella, You can’t smoke. It’s a filthy disgusting habit.” The problem is the man/woman heard me. She/he gave me a look and walked away with a puff of smoke. I then added, a bit too loudly, “And it’s not a man, it’s a woman.”

Our daughter is becoming more away of the world around her, and that means more explanations and some creative verbal improv without the help of the audience yelling “freeze”. Good thing I have a lot to say.